Some favorite workshop quotes from Dr. Scott Simmerman, from over the past 40 years of presenting workshops globally.

I have presented a lot of workshops and seminars and have many different quotes that I embed into the debriefings of our team building workshops and in my Square Wheels sessions. And while I am currently updating a big bunch of support files for Lost Dutchman, I thought to post up some of the quotes and one-liners I use.

Since so many supervisors and managers are looking for ideas and tools to improve their remote meetings and other communications, I thought these might be of interest. Sometimes, having a one-liner can fit perfectly into a workplace discussion around issues and opportunities.

After all, caterpillars CAN fly if they just lighten up, right?

My most favorite quote has been used many times in my blog posts. This is from Joseph Heller, best known for his book, Catch 22. In the first couple of pages of his sequel, Closing Time, Heller writes:

“Nothing made sense, and neither did everything else.”

There are NO LIMITS on how many times you can use this in conversations, from your visits to the DMV to trying to get customer service. I often use this while standing in line somewhere and not understanding why processes are so bad or progress so slow. You can also use it in workshops when talking about process improvement. 

Here are a few of my most used session quotes. And I will leave them as unformatted, so that you can simply copy and paste. Let me also mention that my most favorite closing story, The Moose Joke, is available to download from my website — you can find it on this page.

Here are a few:

Between the idea and the reality,
Between the motion and the act,
Falls the Shadow.
  from the poem “The Hollow Men” by T.S. Eliot
    (Workshop Question: What are some Best Ideas for managing The Shadow?)

 The First Rule of Holes: When you’re in one, stop digging.

 A superior pilot uses his superior judgment to avoid situations that require the use of his superior skill. (Old Aviation Proverb)

Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
         Mark Twain

You don’t get harmony when everybody sings the same note.
         Doug Floyd

Ships in a harbor are safe, but that’s not what ships are built for.
         John Shedd

If a man knows what harbor he seeks, any wind is the right wind.
         Seneca

Any one can hold the helm when the sea is calm.  (
Publilius Syrus)

The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality. The last is to say thank you. 
- Max DePree

We cannot become what we want to be by remaining what we are.
Max Depree

When what you are doing isn’t working, you tend to do more of the same and with greater intensity.
Dr. Bill Maynard & Tom Champoux Heart, Soul and Spirit

Luis Polonia averaged .293 in 13 years of professional baseball. On his second trade from the NY Yankees, he said:  “The Yankees are only interested in one thing. And I don’t know what that is.”

To get rid of the corporate mummies, you have to get rid of corporate pyramids first.         (Advertisement for Origin in Wired Magazine 3.12)

Irish Poem:
   May those who love us, love us
   And those that don’t love us, may god turn their hearts.
   And if he doesn’t turn their hearts, may he turn their ankles,
   So we will know them by their limp.

Don’t pay any attention to the critics – don’t even ignore them.
         Samuel Goldwyn

 Nothing is ever as dangerous as having “The Answer.”
       (That’s “the” as in “duh.”) – Scott Simmerman

If caterpillars were meant to fly, god would have given them wings.

Caterpillars can fly, if they just lighten up. – Scott Simmerman

If you like these, let me know and I can post up some more,